You know that explosion of teenagers offing themselves? Uh, like, no. Suicide rates peak for people in their 80’s — when people are old enough to have lived their lives but not so old they can’t work a gun any longer.

I’m actually surprised as my only suicidal thoughts were during high school. Any teen killing himself is a tragedy, obviously, and the problem is not to be taken lightly. It’s not just tragic, it’s stupid. High school was the worst period of my life. But I’ve had so many wonderful experiences since then (one of whom is grabbing at my arm while I type this).